Our Baby Tilda died on the 2nd February 2013
The weeks and months after she died were so cold
Winter lasted longer than usual that year
On her first birthday
2nd May 2013
We took her ashes to Cornwall
We had booked a holiday there
On a farm with a river
David had built a wooden boat
To sail her ashes down the river
Over the sea to the sky
Baby Tilda was and is our star of the sea
Her middle name Mae
Means Star of the Sea
Now whenever we need to feel close to Tilda
We find water
A river, stream, lake, sea
We also feel her near us whenever it rains or snows
And when she paints the sky with a rainbow
Tom Percival’s latest book
The River
Resonates hugely with me
It is an incredibly powerful picture book
About love and loss
About grief and the big emotions that come with
Losing the ones we love
The story also shows how connected we are with nature
Rowan loves being outside
He loves the hills and trees
But most of all he loves the river
Rowan feels connected to the river
His feelings come and go
Like the water of the river ebbs and flows
Sometimes the river is quiet and calm
Just like Rowan
Sometimes the river roars with anger
Just like Rowan
Tom Percival uses the metaphor of the river
To show how our feelings are constantly changing
To show that whatever we feel is okay
It is part of who we are
One winter Rowan’s best dog friend dies
The river freezes over
Mirroring Rowan’s frozen heart
He does not know what to do or how to feel
Nothing and no one can help him
Though of course his parents try
Rowan tries to think of happier times
But it is just too hard
Even when spring arrives
The river stays frozen
And Rowan is still finding life without his pet very hard
One day Rowan finds an injured baby bird
A bundle of hope and joy all wrapped up in fluffy feathers
Rowan cares for the bird
And as the little bird heals
So too does Rowan’s heart
And the river begins to stir
When Rowan sets the bird free
The ice on the river begins to break
As Rowan learns to smile again
To laugh again
To love again
Rowan will not now live happily ever after
His feelings will come and go
Just like the water of the river ebbs and flows
Sometimes the river is quiet and calm
Just like Rowan
Sometimes the river roars with anger
Just like Rowan
And that is okay
Our feelings are constantly changing
Whatever we feel is okay
It is part of who we are
“Happy and light, slow and sad, wild and angry and everything in between.
…. The river was always changing. Just like Rowan.”
Just like all of us x