Don't cry over spilt treasure!

Searching for Treasure

Yesterday Esther and William celebrated being 9 months old. I did not buy them a present but instead gave them each a treasure basket that I had been collecting the contents for for weeks.

They both enjoyed their baskets but it really highlighted for me the difference between raising a boy baby and a girl.

Esther sat beautifully and looked through the contents of her basket.

William picked up his basket, shook it, turned it upside down and emptied the contents all over the floor!

Esther gently examined the contents with her hands and her mouth, William banged them on the floor before putting them in his mouth.

Esther enjoyed her basket for a full 20 minutes, William had abandoned his after 10 and was coveting Esther’s from 5!!

Esther and William are different in lots of ways and it is so funny how these differences become so apparent through play.

Esther is a generally happier, quieter baby who is easy to settle, soothe and distract.

William is altogether more demanding and gets easily frustrated.

It is funny that their development as well as their play reflects their personalities. Esther can sit beautifully while William is pretty much crawling and always on the move. Esther will play with what she is given while William is alwasy wanting what he is not allowed to have!

David’s Mum gave me a book when the babies were first born about raising boys. It is called 21st Century Boys and is written by Sue Palmer. In the book she states that

Boys are … more ’emotionally reactive’ than girls and researchers note that boy babies display more ‘distress and demands for contact’ than their female counterparts.

This statement is reflected every day in our house where William is often upset and frustrated, needing consoling whilst Esther can happily entertain herself and self soothe. Not that she does not like attention because she really does. She loves to smile and giggle at people and will not allow herself to be left out when we are at a social gathering but she gains attention in a much more subtle way than William who will cry and scream until he gets what he wants or needs.

In NICU William struggled more than Esther with feeding and breathing Sue Palmer’s book confirms that premature baby boys are less likely to survive than girls – in terms of actual maturity, they’re much more premature. It is natural that William did not fair aswell as Esther at the start.

The book goes on to say that

With less well-developed senses, boys may also be less sensitive to parents’ attempts to comfort and communicate with them through smiles and songs

This again we see daily in our house where Esther can easily be distracted if she is upset while William will stubbornly refuse to be soothed or distracted by speaking or songs. He loves a cuddle though and will snuggle up tight as often as he can.

Researchers describe girls as more ‘interested and sociable’ and boys as ‘more excitable’, less easy to soothe and settle. This is just so true in the case of Esther and William.

Sue Palmer shares that

Some cognitive psychologists describe babies and toddlers as behaving like mini-scientists, naturally equipped to fid out about their world by engaging with it in an experimental way

Play develops out of children’s natural urge to explore

This is exactly what I have witnessed watching Esther and William with their treasure baskest, alongside this …

Boys are far more physically active and inclined to ‘naughty’ or risky behaviour

Here are some pictures to prove my point; that boys will be boys from the start, given the opportunity!