4.8.2010

At hospital by 9.  David and I changed their nappies whilst waiting for the doctors to start their rounds.  Both babies had done lovely yellow poos! 

Esther is now on 6mls an hour of milk and it will go up to 7 by this afternoon.  Assuming that she tolerates this well she will be considered to be on full feeds and her long line will be removed tomorrow!  She is doing so well, as well as a premature baby can do, according to Dr Long.  I am so proud of our lovely Esther Grace.

William is doing okay too.  His milk will hopefully go up to 2mls an hour this afternoon.  He still has a heart murmur and is having quite regular periods of forgetting to breathe.  Dr Long warned that this could lead to him being put back on to a ventilator for a while but there are a couple of other things they can try first.

Both babies are being given extra sodium because they are losing too much in their wee.

David left the hospital at 9.30am and I got ready to do some milk.  I was going to sort the house out today but I just want to be with my babies!

After expressing appx 120mls of milk I gave Esther and William their first ever toys.  Their blankies!  A giraffe blankie for Esther and an elephant for William.  They look so cute!  So perfect.  I got some lovely photos.  I also put a couple of white muslins in each of their drawers with a white blanket for Esther and a yellow one for William.  I can’t wait to have them out for cuddles wrapped up in them.

The twins would have reached 29 weeks gestation today.  11 weeks til their due date when they just might come home!

William’s milk went up at 11am to 2mls an hour.  I need to put 200mls into the fridge each morning and freeze the rest.

The nurse today told me that Esther only managed 2 hours off CPAP last night.  So William and Esther are both just having 2 hours off today.  There is no point pushing them more and making them tired.

Both babies were sleeping soundly this morning.  I think it was their new blankets that kept them so calm.  Neither of them fidgeted at all.  They both seemed so peaceful.  I used the time to write out birthday cards that I have been meaning for ages to do.  Maybe I should have gone home?  But I feel that I should be here just in case.

William seems to be having breathing episodes at more frequent intervals.  I am really quite concerned and hope that he can improve on his own before intervention is needed.

Poor William had a new cannula fitted today.  He did not like having it done at all.  I hate it when he cries and I cannot be the one to comfort him.  I love him so much.  Once the cannula was in he seemed to settle quickly again and went straight back to sleep.

My plan for today is as follows

12 – lunch, 12.30 – milk, 1.00 – both babies off CPAP and allowed out for cuddles, 3.00 – cares for both babies, 3.30 – milk.

What a lovely afternoon!

And it has been a lovely afternoon!

William came off his CPAP first and came straight out for a cuddle.  We did Kangaroo Care where he is inside my top so that we can have skin to skin contact.  We stayed like that for one hour whilst I sang and chatted away to him.  I told him all about the nursery and the playroom waiting for him at home.  It was a lovely hour but my scar got really irritated by the heat of William’s body.

After a loo break and some photos – and changing William’s dirty nappy – it was Esther’s turn to come out.  We wrapped her up in her new blanket and she was promptly sick all over it!  Her milk has been upped to the max of 7mls per hour and it seemed to have made her sick.  Poor little Star!  After our very special cuddle time I changed Esther’s nappy and oiled her skin.  She seemed to really like it as I massaged the oil in.  At the end of 2 hours William and Esther had their blood gases tested.  William’s was not so great so his CPAP went back on, Esther’s was good and so she stayed off for 3 hours.  they tried for 4 but she was just too tired.

I did some milk at ten to four and now I am waiting for David but have no idea when he is coming, or if Clare, Sujo and Rohan are coming too?!?

The doctor handover was at 4.30pm.  No cause for concern with either of our babies.  They just need to continue to grow stronger every day and they MUST remember to breathe!

I asked the nurse today about what babies can see.  She said that they can see shape and shadow.  Nearer to their due date they will make out figures in black and white but it will only be after their due date that they be able to actually see us and begin to recognise us.  But what they can recognise and remember now is our voices and our smell.  Poor little babies.  They cannot see!

Esther is now off the TPN fluid.  She is on 10% dextrose and 7mls of milk an hour.

William is slightly anaemic but nothing to worry about yet.  He is also borderline for needing to go back under the blue light for jaundice!  Poor William.  He is not doing so well.  He has slept a lot today though and seems to be tolerating his milk and so will hopefully go up to 3mls hourly tomorrow.  Come on William, precious little boy.  We are all rooting for you!

A full term baby came on to the ward this evening, called Phoebe.  She was very cute.  The nurses were all cooing over her and cuddling her.  I can’t wait til mine are more grown!

It has come to my attention today that I am the only person who spends all day here on her own.  I think the parents of the other twins are living here and Eddie’s parents are here all day but always together.  Other babies seem to spend a lot of time alone.  I now that there are things I could and should be doing but none of them seem important right now.  I just want to be with my babies but it can be such a long and lonely day.